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Astrology & Dicks

After a two year long intensive research, I was able to collect information about dick sizes and shapes and how the astrological signs influence them. For this particular scientific investigation in this unexplored realm, I concluded that more accurate results could be collected through the use of several methods. The methods were primarily pretested to validate the use of those particular approaches. The used methods of research concluded surveys (through Snapchat, Skype Calls and Twitter DM’s), observations (on various cam boy sites) and even personal, intimate Interviews (through the help of apps, such as Grindr). 
With the astrological foreknowledge on sexual intercourse, lust and the body, the consensus was to focus on the following areas: 
  • Sun Sign
  • Mars Sign
  • 8th house 
The results (*Disclaimer: Genetics exist*): 
  • Size and girth: They’ll usually either have very short and less girthy dicks, or very big, juicy ones. It’s hard to find an Aries dominant (Sun, Mars 8th) who’s in between. You either don’t feel it or you start walking side to side. 
  • Shape: Not the most pleasing to look at for many people. They’re not clean cut dicks, but rather the kind of dick, where you can count the veins. They also often have a foreskin, that they can not fully pull back. Very distinctive is the fact, that their dicks are almost always shaped in some weird way/angle. 
  • Recap: They are rough and wild as fuck. Even if you don’t like the D at first, they’ll make you love it. 
  • Size and girth: It’s hard to find a Taurus that’s below average, but it is also almost as hard to find one that is highly above average. If you are not a total size queen, they have the perfect size for you. Almost all of them are girthy, definitely above average. (though proportion-wise, so do not expect a small guy to have a dick as girthy as a red bull can) 
  • Shape: Very clean-cut & straight. Very pleasing to look at, very good to suck on. Not really about shape, but they usually trim their bushes, but the trimmed hair make the dick even more appealing. 
  • Recap: They won’t ever disappoint you. Very sensual and attractive.
  • Size and girth: Congrats Gemini Sun/Mars/8th house people! You guys are definitely above average (most of the time). Sadly, most of you guys also have pencil dicks. 
  • Shape: Mostly straight or banana-shaped. Not the best dicks in the zodiac, but DEFINITELY not the worst. Clean - looking. 
  • Recap: They know how to please you. Sneaky, charming, sexy. 
  • Size and girth: Usually really juicy, which makes everything better automatically. They’ll either have a slightly above average dick or a reaally small one. I’m sorry cancers. Your girth is alright though. But who cares anyways, they’re all bottoms. 
  • Shape: Nice to look at. As I said, very juicy. Either straight or banana-shaped. 
  • Recap: Great dicks to suck. There’s something special about their dicks. Cancers can be really kinky sometimes, so fun is guaranteed. 
  • Size and girth: You’d think all of them have huge dicks, but that is suprisingly not the case at all. A lot of them have really small ones. Maybe that’s why they have so many self esteem issues. The ones that don’t have small ones, are definitely above average. (7+ inches)
  • Shape: Nothing too wild, nothing too weird. Dicks are usually straight, could be curved downwards. 
  • RecapThey know (!!!) how to seduce you, they’re literally one of the, if not the best at making the experience one you’ll never forget. They know what to say and they know what to do. You won’t give a damn about the dicks shape or size. 
  • Size and girth: Usually, petite, not the biggest dicks in the zodiac. Girth is proportion-wise alright.
  • Shape: They have nice looking dicks. Probably the sign with the least deformed looking ones. Their dicks can look like Taurean dicks, which is supposed to be a compliment. 
  • Recap: Well, I guess they’ll try their best to please you. Many would describe them as boring, though that is not their dicks fault. 
  • Size and girth: There’s nothing to discuss here. Big long, girthy perfect dicks. 
  • Shape: Usually straight, some of them are curved left or right. The longer and cleaner looking versions of Taurean dicks. 
  • Recap: Not the most passionate lovers on earth, however they are charming, still really good at sex and usually have nice looking dicks too. 
  • Size and girth: The best dicks in the zodiac, don’t even try to argue with me. Big, long, girthy like the Libra dicks, however, Scorpio dicks look a bit rougher and realer, which is what you want in a perfect dick!!! 
  • Shape: PERFECT LOOKING. Girthy as fuck, really long, beautifully shaped (mostly straight or upwards curved). 
  • Recap: You wanna suck on that dick, till you make it cum. Besides Aries’, the most passionate lovers! Not as rough and wild as an Aries, but more emotinally intense sex, that will make you crave their dick at any time!
  • Size and girth: Their dicks are really similar to Gemini dicks, their opposite sign. Really long dicks (longer than Geminis), not that girthy though.
  • Shape: Juicy and clean looking. They usually have a long flaccid dick too. 
  • Recap: If you’re looking for size and quality sex, hunt a Sag dick. Though, do not get emotionally involved. 
  • Size and girth: As their fellow earth sign, Virgo, petite in size, but an average girth. Strong Saturn influence will not give one a huge dick (except genes say yes).
  • Shape: Nice to look at. Not rough looking like an Aries or Aquarius dick for example. Either fully shaved or a full bush. 
  • Recap: If they care about you, they’ll try their best. Like Sagittarians, not emotionally involed in the act. 
  • Size and girth: They’ll usually have long dicks and good girth too. (But just like their opposite sign, Leo, cases of small dicks are not rare.) 
  • Shape: A bit rough looking, they may have the same foreskin problem as Aries’. Though, rough looking is always a compliment. 
  • Recap: Freaks in bed, definitely not boring. They can be real wild and hardcore. 
  • Size and girth: Often said to have the largest dicks in the zodiac. I don’t want to go that far, but they’re definitely (!) one of the bigger signs. Very girthy too!!
  • Shape: Usually, curved upwards or simply straight. It’s somewhere inbetween rough and clean looking. Nevertheless, very good looking dicks.
  • Recap: Not boring either, they can be real freaky. However, most of the time, it is more emotionally intense than physically. 


  1. I made a donation to your cash app. How do I get access to your drive?

    1. Email me luckeyfstarr@yahoo.com or luckeynatl@gmail.com with your receipt.

  2. That was a little bias! Virgos are far from boring and some of the biggest freaks you'll mmee, maybe you had some bad experiences idk. Don't let that calm demeanor fool you.

  3. what stank loose booty power bottom wrote this list?


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